Category Archives: mother’s story

Rambling thoughts: Gender Polarization and solution

In Christ 5

In Christ position

Gender polarization is an ancient monster that has reared its ugly head menacingly and is increasingly prowling around looking for victims to devour in this time. But I cannot remember my siblings and I being deliberately brought up in the polarization way. We were just flowing with life and circumstances.

In my family the women could appear stronger than the men. For example, when a gigantic venomous monitor lizard (or viper) entered our house the men (my dad and eldest brother) ran away and my mom was the one who took up a weapon (a long sharp metal something) pierced the head of the monster and pinned it to the ground. She shouted for the man folk to return and deal with the threshing dying beast. They had no clue what to do. So she instructed them to fetch a tough huge sack so she could cast it into it, tie the sack up and ask them to cart it to the back yard and burn it to ashes. We children were stunned and awed by the cool, composed, tough and bloodless execution all done without display of any emotion on her part.

If my eldest sister was home she probably would have run away too. As for me? I neither fled nor fought. I was just a curious eight years old bystander. Courage is not gender specific. When we kids grow up and have our own family we have displayed immense courage too when needed to protect our loved ones. I cannot think of any specific trait labelled gender-specific in my family.

No, my mom was not a superwoman of gigantic size and power. She was a beautiful, elegant, intelligent and knowledgeable average size business woman. She was considered the best dressed woman for all time in the oil town where she lived most of her adult life. She rose to the monster-killing occasion when needed. Her goal? Protect her little chicks (including a toddler and an infant) like a mother hen does. After the incident she sat down and continued her afternoon tea as if nothing had happened. Then she instructed us to return to our homework. She was capable of and focused on multitasking as the circumstances required. That was my typical mom.

So where do all these ugly scenes of gender polarization out there come from? Knowing where they come from helps us to resolve them or kill them, just as my mom did with the “monster”.

What about running to the street and crying wolves? You may be too late. The monster (mobster) is really big and evil out there and its sole purpose is to use you and other human to steal, kill and destroy everything human value and love.

What is the solution? This is a question for every Christian to turn inward and ask oneself. One thing I know, aligning with the polarization monster will not bring salvation or deliverance. Whatever you do, if the outcome is creating more divisiveness, more hurt and more destruction, then your alignment is with the death monster and not with the super-abundant life that God has promised and given you and your loved ones in Christ Jesus.

My solution? Come to the point where our sole identity is in Christ. Start afresh from this equality foundation. Unshakable. See yourself the way that God has made you in Christ changes how you think about yourself and that matters most. God is a lot more concerned with where you are going than where you came from. God is in the spiritual realm. He has the best thoughts for you. Why don’t you go to Him for your inner healing instead of calling out the dead and let other more destructive men use you for their ends?


favorites: remember the good times

my All-Time Favoriteswpid-2014-11-03-09.23.54.png.pngpath-decorative-caa lone cyprus20151127 last rosehigh tea harrods
All the above were posted in this blog each with its own history…

awakening women in economics

“Women have awoken.” Some reporters/editors/media opinion might describe women this way when they pen some news about women taking part in some public group actions occasionally. Let us not congratulate ourselves too soon as we read their remark. The remark implies only one thing: women/some women had been sleeping beauties all this while. This is of course nonsense.

For the information of the uninitiated, most women have always been wide awake. We know what goes on. But we just do not talk about it with you. We also know better than to join ourselves with actions which we know are subject to manipulations by ulterior motive/secret agenda with which we do not agree. Why should we lend you our strength? We each have one vote with equal power as yours. We speak with votes. We are the silent but effective majority.

What are our agenda? We are committed to taking care of and training our children on the right track for their future. We know what it means if we support a social/cultural/political misconception that it is good to steal from another’s purse. No, we are not proud of any form of stealing (in whatever nice name/philosophy like “equal-distribution” you may dress it). Why? Because it can only mean one thing: that our children are inferior and must have some forms of handicaps to help them to survive. No. We are not proud of that connotation. We are not proud of being classified by any classification that would render us to be subject to handout/quota/special treatment. We refuse to wear that hat.

Traditionally, once upon a time, in fairy tales, women were admired for being sleeping beauties. But, man, get real. We are wide awake and we have purposed in our hearts to impart to our children the awake values and strategies: just, honest, ethical, motivated, diligent, intelligent, and wise, committed to a profession, a trade, a craft, a labor, a work effort and a production in prospering the economy, social development and nation building. Yes, you will be surprised, we women know economics better than you do.

Judges 5:12 New King James Version (NKJV)
12 “Awake, awake, Deborah!
Awake, awake, sing a song!
Arise, Barak, and lead your captives away,
O son of Abinoam!

She sees a GREAT NATION. She is a mother.

Leah_w_Rachel_67-63There is a mystery about Leah. She has unusual eyes. She is the the older sister of Rachel. She was the first wife of Jacob and gave birth to six sons and one daughter. The Bible did not describe her look except a sentence about her eyes. Her eyes were attractive. I have previously written about her faith in God and her close relationship with God. She knew that her husband’s first love was Rachel who was more physically attractive. BUT Leah loved Jacob. She was determined to have his children and she had six sons: Reuben, Simeon, Levi, Judah, Issachar and Zebulun. She named all her sons. Jacob did not seem to care. She named them in terms of her relationship with God and her perspective of God.

(This is what she said when she had her first four sons: Genesis 29,30)
So Leah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Reuben; for she said, “The Lord has surely looked on my affliction. Now therefore, my husband will love me.” Then she conceived again and bore a son, and said, “Because the Lord has heard that I am unloved, He has therefore given me this son also.” And she called his name Simeon. She conceived again and bore a son, and said, “Now this time my husband will become attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.” Therefore his name was called Levi. And she conceived again and bore a son, and said, “Now I will praise the Lord.” Therefore she called his name Judah. Then she stopped bearing.
(Later she had two more sons: )And God listened to Leah, and she conceived and bore Jacob a fifth son. Leah said, “God has given me my wages, because I have given my maid to my husband.” So she called his name Issachar. Then Leah conceived again and bore Jacob a sixth son. And Leah said, “God has endowed me with a good endowment; now my husband will dwell with me, because I have borne him six sons.” So she called his name Zebulun.

What is so great about Leah’s eyes? From what we have read we see that this woman is without malice or jealousy. She sees and keeps her focus on God’s goodness and the good sides of life. She does not even blame God for her unloving husband or her possibly unshapely body. She does not give up on her love. She does her best. Se knows that only God can grant her the favor and ability to give birth. She is not ashamed or embarrassed by her fertility or try to be politically correct. Mother needs not be politically correct. She not only has one son, she carries on and has six! She sees what God has done even in her little world as a housewife and gives thanks. She sees the future where her many sons will grow up and do great things. She is right. Her sons did great things. They became the ancestors of the Israel nation. She became the mother of kings and priests. Yes, her eyes do matter. Instead of a mere family, she sees a great nation! And history has proven her right.

The versions of the Bible describing Leah with lovely eyes are as follows:
GW Leah had attractive eyes, but Rachel had a beautiful figure and beautiful features.
GNT Leah had lovely eyes, but Rachel was shapely and beautiful.
TLB Leah had lovely eyes, but Rachel was shapely, and in every way a beauty.
NOG Leah had attractive eyes, but Rachel had a beautiful figure and beautiful features.
MSG Now Laban had two daughters; Leah was the older and Rachel the younger. Leah had nice eyes, but Rachel was stunningly beautiful. And it was Rachel that Jacob loved. So Jacob answered, “I will work for you seven years for your younger daughter Rachel.”

Did Jacob finally recognize it was Leah he should give honor as his lawful heavenly-ordained wife? He did. We read from below the words he gave his sons before he died: (Genesis 49)
Then he charged them and said to them: “I am to be gathered to my people; bury me with my fathers in the cave that is in the field of …which Abraham bought with the field of Ephron the Hittite as a possession for a burial place. There they buried Abraham and Sarah his wife, there they buried Isaac and Rebekah his wife, and there I buried Leah…”

continue to watch this woman of finance

Andrea_Leadsom2_3601479b-large_trans++pJliwavx4coWFCaEkEsb3kvxIt-lGGWCWqwLa_RXJU8“I decided I was going to be an MP when I was 13,” Andrea Leadsom reveals. It was the mid-1970s. Industrial strife, blackouts and a weak economy had earned Britain the unwanted label of “the sick man of Europe”.

Her political conversion came less from Britain’s post-War decline than the Cold War and what she describes as her feeling of “absolute terror” at the threat of a nuclear conflict.

“I thought, if I go and become and MP I can save the world from a nuclear holocaust,” she says.

Forty years later, Mrs Leadsom finds herself at the heart of a government confronting a new kind of terror: the threat from jihadists who have attacked Europe 14 times in the past 14 months.

“Getting rid of internal borders without properly policing external borders has proven to be a huge risk” Andrea Leadsom

As the horror of the Brussels attacks unfolded, Mrs Leadsom was confirmed in her own conviction that Britain would be safer outside the European Union. Now she is campaigning in the referendum to convince the public to vote to leave.

“It is a terrible thing to have to consider it in that context,” she says. “We can’t use this disaster in Brussels to make the case for ‘Brexit’. It is devastating. But I fear being in the EU does make a difference to the risks to our own citizens.”
In an interview with The Telegraph, the Energy Minister reveals why she believes it is time for Britain to leave the EU. She dismantles the “silly” scaremongering from the likes of the Prime Minister and his allies about the risks of leaving; sets out her vision for a “brilliant” future for Britain as an unshackled trading nation; and urges mothers to vote to leave in the referendum in June for their children and grandchildren – who may never have this chance again.

Yet uppermost in her mind in the wake of the Brussels bombings is the security threat to Britain that she fears will only grow as a result of Europe’s policy of mass migration. The “madness of open borders” within the EU’s free travel zone is “incredibly dangerous” and will put the UK in greater peril, she says.

“Getting rid of internal borders without properly policing external borders has proven to be a huge risk.” Monitoring the movements of individuals across Europe has become fraught with challenges, she says. “Having a European passport – as it appears a number of terrorists do have – is actually making things even more difficult.”
Her opponents – including David Cameron – have warned that Britain’s ability to share intelligence with other EU countries and tackle extremists would be undermined by Brexit.

Mrs Leadsom is careful to be polite about her colleagues but clearly disagrees.

“It is not the case that being out of the EU would prevent us from cooperating. In fact the moral and actual duty to cooperate – as we do with the United States – would remain.

“Would we lose anything from Brexit in terms of intelligence sharing? No. Would we gain anything in terms of national security? I am afraid I think the answer has to be Yes.”

For all her warnings, Mrs Leadsom, 52, is not a hard-hearted Right-winger with anti-migrant views. In fact, as a pro-business minister who grew up as the daughter of entrepreneurs, she understands that employers need to be able to recruit widely to fill the vacancies in the workforce.
And as a mother of three, who founded a charity to help infants and young families, Mrs Leadsom is also acutely conscious of the human tragedy unfolding in the refugee crisis on the shores of the Mediterranean.

“I absolutely feel for the migrants – families, mums with young children, unaccompanied children – they must be helped and we can’t turn our backs,” she warns.

She condemns the “horrible” solution proposed by Brussels to ease the impact of the migration crisis on the EU: sending refugees back to Turkey and in exchange allowing Turks visas to move to Europe.

Yet the impact of migration into the UK – which is close to record levels – also affects British families trying to use public services, she says.

“People trying to get their child into a local school, get a doctors’ appointment, trying to get housing, they are competing with what is already a huge wave of people coming to this country looking for work.

“We need workers to build our businesses but I have seen and I am concerned that in the last 10 years since this massive wave of EU migration, wages have been held down by the enormous amount of labour that has come to the country.”

According to the likes of Lord Rose, the former Marks & Spencer boss now leading the “In” campaign, Brexit would ruin businesses, wreck the economy, and cost millions of jobs.

Mrs Leadsom savages these arguments. “The Remain camp are using project fear and it’s very silly because so few of the claims really hold water. For example, saying we will lose three million jobs. That’s just blatant nonsense.”

Britain’s attractions for businesses will remain – the talent pool of highly trained recruits for the City; world-leading universities and scientists; high quality contract law; the English language; the UK’s time zone; and “the most creative and inventive financial centre in the world”.

She also dismisses claims by her boss at the Department for Energy and Climate Change, Amber Rudd, the Energy Secretary, who warned in a speech last week that Brexit could put up energy bills and lead Russia to wreak chaos in the gas market.
“I really can’t see why bills would go up,” Mrs Leadsom says. Electricity is traded internationally on a commercial basis and “gas we get from around the world”, she says. “Our energy security is not dependent on the EU at all. It is rock solid.”

But her central point is that the core of the EU must move towards closer integration among the Eurozone countries, aligning economies as divergent as Greece and Germany – while Britain stands by and watches.

“We are not on the same path,” she says. “It’s not about being a little islander. There are huge opportunities from the rest of the world. We do not need to be handcuffed to the European Union.”

Mrs Leadsom seems to embody the entrepreneurial spirit that animates the free market strand of Tory thinking. After a 30 year career in the financial sector, she entered Parliament in 2010 as MP for the new constituency of South Northamptonshire.

Soon afterwards, while still a junior backbencher, she co-founded the Fresh Start Project, a Eurosceptic pressure group of MPs who wanted to overhaul the UK’s membership of the EU.

Now, despite being a busy minister, she has revived the group, which meets weekly and is drawing up a series of leaflets to set out “what Brexit could look like” for farmers, doctors, city traders, small business owners, and others.

“My mum raised us to believe the world does not owe you a living” Andrea Leadsom

As a dynamic senior Tory women and free market supporter, she inevitably attracts comparisons with Margaret Thatcher.

Where does Mrs Leadsom get her work ethic and her politics? After her parents – both entrepreneurs – divorced when she was four, her mother, Judy “worked all hours” to support the family in difficult circumstances. Four years later, she remarried and set up a furniture shop.

“My Mum raised us to believe the world does not owe you a living, nobody is going to help you out and you need to make your own way in life. She describes herself as a market trader and my step-dad is a bit of an armchair socialist.

“Over family dinners, the conversation always turned to politics. I instinctively thought my Mum was right because what you need in life is opportunity – and then you just have to work.”

Now, with what might be the only chance for a say over Britain’s future in Europe, Mrs Leadsom is working to convince mothers across Britain to think of their children, and grandchildren, when they vote in the referendum on June 23.

“I have three kids. Everything I do is for them. What are the opportunities they are going to have? I see increasingly shackles if we stay in an EU that is in decline, and I just see the moist fabulous opportunities, pushing down the drawbridges to the rest of the world. That is what I want for them.”

(Tim Ross 26 MARCH 2016 )

happy mother’s day: a golden haiku for my mother

happy mother's day 2016

endurance patience
faith hope love joy peace
strength to strength she glows

“Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.” (Proverbs 31:30-31)

grand-aunt’s visit 23: once a bird (a haiku)

once a bird

she was once a bird

a mother perhaps in time

sadly snared and caged

~~~~~~~~Visiting museum is not the senior’s favorite. Because she prefers to see life, its vibrance, enthusiasm and hope. The museum records a past. There is no hope there. There is hope in the future. Where are the children of this bird if any? The grand-aunt cannot help but wonder. That is why she prefers to visit the botanical garden and the aquarium. But the birds are not the only ones snared and caged in museums. Many others share the same fate too. Even human. How she looks forward to hearing the songs of the living birds again in her own garden, a tiny park in front of her home.


Song of Solomon 2:12 The flowers are springing up, the season of singing birds has come, and the cooing of turtledoves fills the air.

grand-aunt’s visit 14: dearly and gently

a gentle morning

grand-aunt’s remarks:

“walking is easy”

when you hold the hand you love

dearly and gently


He will feed His flock like a shepherd; He will gather the lambs with His arm, And carry them in His bosom, And gently lead those who are with young. (Isaiah 40:11 In Context | Full Chapter)